Monday, March 5, 2007

What We Have Here Is A Failure To Communicate

Remember this?
Umm... yeah, not so cute anymore.
The Mouse is lacking in the verbal skills department. But why speak when she can exercise her lungs.

All. Day. Long.
She has turned into a screamer.
(Which, if applied in the proper situations much MUCH later in life, will make some man very happy one day.)
Her screams have now become synonymous with any and every request that a Toddler can possibly think up in a 24 hour period.
I want that toy.
I want to sit in your lap.
I want you to read me this book. No... wait, I want to get down.
I want this book.

NO.
This book!
I want that cup. Not that cup. THAT cup. No I want THAT CUP. Over there. THAT CUP! THAT CUP! GAWD YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME!
I want something to eat.
I want something else to eat.
I don't want to sit in my chair and eat.
I want my snack trap.
With Cheerios. Froot Loops. Oreos. Will they fit?
I want to play with the phone.
I want to play with the television remote.
No the REAL one; not the one without the batteries.
I want the toy my Brother is playing with. Oh, he's not playing with it anymore? Then I don't want it either.
I want the toy my Brother is playing with NOW.
Give me the toy.
GIVE IT TO ME.
NOW!
I want you to turn this toy on.
I want you to turn this toy off.
I want you to take the lid off this container.
I want you to put the lid back on this container.
I want to brush my own teeth.
NO! I want you to brush my teeth!
I want you to change my diaper.
Why are you putting me on the changing table and taking off my diaper?
PUT MY DIAPER BACK ON!
Why are my feet covered by socks? WHO PUT SOCKS ON MY FEET?
I want to take my socks off.
Take my socks off for me.
NOW!
What are these things in my hair?
I want to play with them.
I want you to take them out.
NOW!
I don't like the book you read me before. I want you to read THIS one.
No, no, no. I don't want you to actually read this book.
I want you to turn the pages.
Like I am a speed reader.
NO. You're turning the pages too fast. I can't see the pictures!

Start over.
I don't want you to turn the pages.
I want to do it myself.
These pages are too thin. I can't turn them.
Turn the pages for me.
I am tired. I want to go to bed.

::sigh::
She's not the only one.

2 comments:

Kendra said...

We have one of those here too, those toddler girl things. Who is awake. After 15 minutes' nap. Will she stay awake? I hope not. I am pretending she is still asleep. At least she is not screaming at the moment. But it will happen...oh, it will happen.

i want it NOW! said...

that was a hilarious post! Maybe I'm laughing b/c its a little too close to home... my son is getting pretty ornery in his toddlerdom too.