Gretel: Mom can you have a baby?
Me: *stares at her blankly* (Oh crap.)
Gretel: Mom can you have a baby so I can be the Big Sister?
Me: Honey, you need a Daddy to have a baby.
Gretel: Well, Hansel can carry it, Mom and we can drive over and then he can hand it to Daddy and then Daddy can take it and carry it into his house.
Me: Oh, you're talking about when you VISIT Daddy?
(Why I didn't let this conversation die RIGHT HERE is beyond me.)
Me: Well baby, what I mean is that you need both a Mommy and a Daddy to MAKE a baby.
Gretel: You MADE me?
Gretel: Daddy and you MADE me?!
Gretel: Daddy helped you to MAKE me?!?!?!
Me: Well there's a cell in Daddy's body and a cell in Mommy's body and they need to be put together so a baby can grow in my tummy.
(Crap!. Now she's going to ask me HOW do the cells come together and get into my tummy!!!! Shut up NOW woman and stop answering this kid!! Distract her with Halloween candy or something!)
Gretel: Mom, he can help! You can text Daddy and he can come over and help you.
So glad I didn't put an end this conversation prematurely. I haven't laughed that HARD in a long time.